


Dear Shaun

by antivillain (museofspeed)



Category: Newsflesh Trilogy - Mira Grant
Genre: Epistolary, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 22:56:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17109740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/museofspeed/pseuds/antivillain
Summary: Sanjukta Gowda, age 4, writes to her favorite Irwin.





	Dear Shaun

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lady_sarai](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lady_sarai/gifts).



> Happy Yule!!

Deer Sha ~~w~~ un,

I am Sanjukta. I am 4. You can call me San if you want ~~becuz~~ because Sanjukta is a lot of letters. Daddy says he used to work with you in ~~Amare~~ ~~Amm~~ USA. Do you think I ~~cud~~ could grow up to be a ~~erwin~~ Irwin to? Mommy says its a bad job and that your bad and wake her up but I think you are cool. Here's a picher I drew of you and Daddy and me fiting zombies.

Love,  
San

\--

Dear Shaun,

I know you and Georgia are avoiding the rest of the world, and I respect that, but my daughter wrote to you and if you fail to respond to her I will fly out to Canada myself and forcibly drag you to England to answer her in person, are we clear?

Yours,  
Mahir

P.S. And don't you dare encourage her to be an Irwin.

\--

Dear San,

Wow, that picture is awesome!! I put it on the fridge so I can see it every day. And yeah, fighting zombies is pretty cool, and you can be anything you want when you grow up, Irwin included. But what your dad does is pretty cool too. I mean, writing all those long articles! Pretty thrilling stuff. And whatever your mom does, which I'm assuming is something-yelling based, is also important. 

Anyway, here's a picture of me riding a zombie moose.

Shaun

\--

Dear Mahir,

Love you too.

Shaun

\--

Dear Shaun,

Was it not enough to consistently destroy my sleep schedule? Have I not been a good friend and ally for all these years? What precisely did I ever do that you feel the need to torment me so?

Sanjukta loved your letter. She demanded we frame the photograph and it's now hanging in her room. I get to see your face whenever I go to kiss my daughter good night. She wants to play "Irwin" every chance she gets. Did you not see the part about _not_ encouraging this?

So far I have no plans to fly over _again_ to yell at you in person, but I can make no promises about my wife. I am fairly sure Nan hates you more than ever. I hope you're proud. Here is her newest artwork. I promised I'd forward it. 

Give my regards to Georgia. And please do remember that zombies can still eat you even if they can't turn you. I do not want to break the news of your death to my little girl and, apparently, your new biggest fan.

Mahir

\--

Mahir--

Our fridge is only so big. How many more of your daughter's scribbles are you going to send us?

G

\--

Georgia--

She drew this one of you.

M

\--

Dammit.

G

\--

You realize this is completely just recompense for all you've put me through over the years?

M

\--

Dear Shaun and Gorga

Thank you for the moose pictur. Daddy told me that Gorga does cool zombie things to but Shaun is still my favrite. Daddy also says Gorga has more letters but there all silent but I think that's to many silent letters. Will you be at Auntie Maggie's party for Crismas? Daddy says no but its in the USA and your in the USA and were going to fly there on an airplane and then I could meet you! Plees come? 

I drew me and Mommy and Daddy on an airplane and Shaun and Gorga waving.

Love,  
San

PS Daddy told me your actually in Canada but I looked on a map and thats right next to USA so you shud still come.

\--

Mahir,

This is dirty pool.

G

\--

G,

It's not like we'd get to see you if we played fair.

M

\--

Dear San,

You're right that Georgia's name is spelled super weirdly. I just call her George. You can too, if you want.

Unfortunately, Canada and the US are way, way bigger than England, so even though they look really close, it would take us a really long time to get to Maggie's party. Plus, there's a lot of snow and zombies in the way. I'm pretty awesome, but even I can only get through so many at a time, you know? But we'll definitely hang out someday. Promise. Give Auntie Maggie a hug from me.

Love,  
Shaun

\--

Hi Mahir,

I'm sorry, I really am. Shaun and I talked it over. Please understand that we were more tempted to come back for this than we have been for anything else. Sanjukta is a wonderful child, and someday, I hope we can meet her. But not now. And really, do you actually want two walking news magnets like us around your kid?

Believe me, when we're ready, you'll be the first to know. Maybe we'll even fly out to England to make our fantastic debut in person. 

Please don't ask again.

Love,  
Georgia

\--

Dammit, Georgia, she's not the only one who wants to see you.

Mahir

\--

I know. I'm sorry.

Georgia

\--

Dear Shaun

Daddy says you and George are bizy in Canada and can't come see us when we're in the USA. Thats sad and I'm sad. But I know you have to fight zombie mooses and stuff and George has to make people tell the truth like Daddy. It's ok and I'm sad but not mad. Daddy is sad too. But someday maybe you can fite zombies in London with me? 

Merry Crismas! I love you bye!

San


End file.
